For days I have been contemplating what I want for 2011. I knew that there were several challenges that lay ahead and I could not say that it would be an easy year. Not that an "easy" year even exists, we all have our own set of trials that we must overcome. I just already know a few of mine.There were many difficult things that happened in 2010, things I never saw coming. I had such high hopes for 2010. I just knew it would be the best year yet. Instead in it's first mere month, my life completely changed. Life as I once knew would be replaced by much heartache on January 30th. All of my past struggles seemed to grow faint as I now faced a year that would be filled with tribulation. I have often felt isolated, lonely, sad, hurt, and angered on most days. Life as I had known would take me down a path of uncertainty, confusion, strain, and strife. Although 2010 brought with it unbearable things and life changing events, there are some things that I have learned. Some of them things I never wanted to know and some that brought with it many things I needed to know.
* Life is something not to be taken for granted. In a fraction of a second a life can be taken away.
* I realized that I cannot do it on my OWN, I need HIM with each step I take.
* Knowing who God is and having a relationship with him are two very different things.
* Just because one bad things happens doesn’t mean more bad things won’t occur.
* I have a lot more strength that I ever wanted to know but God showed me in him you will have all the strength you need when you actually need it.
* Tears can be a very healing thing.
* Things of this world are merely “just things.” We will never take them to our true home.
* I never really grasped the effects a loss can have on someone, if someone told me about their loss, I never thought much more about it. I just gave them the “I’m sorry” line.
* Over time, those who you once thought mattered, trickle away and you realize they didn’t.
* There is a hole in my heart and I feel a part of me is gone. But I have also been given some new parts.
* You can hurt the one’s that are closest to you. Taking your pain and anger out on them isn’t really going to help.
*There are so many blessings in life we take for granted.
* God is good.
I am sure there are many more lessons to be taken away from this past year. But that might take up a book. These are just a few that I hope to learn from. I mess up often, taking one step forward and two back. Keeping my eyes on God and fully surrendering to him all of my worries and fears will lead me to who he wants me to be. I hope to find my purpose and how to use some of these things to help others. Taking it one day at a time and most often one step at a time. The only book on how to live your life is found in the Bible. I need to use the tools God has given me to heal, trust him, surrender, maintain faith, grow, become more like him, and not always look at the negative but see the positive which he provides. We all must face our maker and what a glorious day that will be, but we are here for now and must make the best of what we have in living out our temporary life here on Earth.
So my verse for this year, the lesson of trust, surrender, and faith. He has allowed me to make it this far, he will continue to give me perseverance
Isaiah 40:31 But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength, They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.