It's Peeking In...

Isaiah 40:31 But those who hope in the Lord, will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.


I have hoped in the Lord, my strength is beginning to be renewed. Even though there have been several trials and struggles in my life, I look back now and see where I was weak he made me strong, he kept me going, persevering in the darkest of days. And a hallelujah for that!
This past week was heartbreaking but at the end God brought me joy! Sunday, the 30th, was the 1 year anniversary of my brother's murder. We had a graveside candlelight vigil with lots of family and friends. It breaks my heart to see his friends that emotional about the one I called brother. We released chinese flying lanterns, which was a lot of fun even though we almost set a tree on fire.
My husband had interviewed twice with the same company in the past 2 weeks and we knew we should be hearing something this week, but by Thursday with no word, I could see my husband getting discouraged. I continued to pray and I knew there were a lot of people who were praying too.
I had plans to meet my friends (most of which I haven't seen since my brother's funeral) for my birthday dinner since I wasn't able to do anything around my birthday. Let me just tell you, when you have friends surrounding you that have been with you for over 10 years, all of us, still together, it made for a wonderful evening. I had secluded myself a lot this past year after my brother's death. These same friends whom I was with last night had thrown me a surprise birthday party last year on the 29th that led into the early morning of the 30th. Well, that was the morning I woke up to a world spinning full throttle out of control, and not just my head, from previous night experience, but because at 7am my parents walked through my front door with news that would forever change us. Our family, still broken, but 1 year later we are still standing and I knew it was Jesus who had saved us all this year. Over the past week I could not get my mind off the fact that last year between Jan 31 to Feb 2, we were planning a funeral and life just sucked and seemed so unfair.
But this year I had a peace within me through the week, even while my heart was breaking, peace was there too.
So onto the job, my husband FINALLY found a job and he starts Monday! Which was another whirlwind because we had absolutely no idea what to do for childcare. Heck, we still don't know. We have figured one of the times we need for childcare but the other no such luck, but even in the midst of figuring out the logistics of making it all come together, getting ready for a "new" routine, I feel so grateful for all those who prayed, so thankful for a God who is so good. I see it now God, I really do. He makes us learn patience, for nothing is ever on our time. And apart from him, we can do nothing.
My dinner with my girlfriends was remarkable. We had such a good time and one of my friends brought her 4 month old sweet little girl and another is expecting her 4th girl! And those 2 girls have forever changed my life. They both have been with me throughout this whole journey, through the hardness this past year brought, they were always there. It was a moment a year ago I never thought possible. I was still here, better than ever, with God at my right hand. And my friends give some of the best presents ever! I got 2 gift certificates to get my hair done (which is WAY too far overdue) but not now, I gonna get my hair did!
 I got a beautiful pillow that says "Trust in the Lord," I will have to take a picture of it, it is just so encouraging. I was given a beautiful clock with some great quotes about life. I got the cutest picture frame that has my monogram on it. I love all things monogrammed and cannot wait to get a picture in it. I know the exact one I will use too, the picture of all of us girls, who a year ago were worried about me and grieving with me. But that night I smiled, I laughed, I loved, and I felt alive. It was special to me.
Isaiah 40:31 But those who hope in the Lord, will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.
Makes my heart smile, because we WILL soar on wings like eagles; not in our timing but in God's.
You can see in this picture how BAD I needed those gift certificate's. LOL don't judge, we all have bad hair days, mine has just lasted a little, ok a LOT, longer! And I am the one in the glasses, again, no judging.





A few photos from the grave Sunday....my grandmother took these, well, my Mamaw!







With Love,